Final Draft, Academic Success.

For this project, I was tasked with a challenge that I face with my academics. As someone who struggles with multiple things, I wanted to pick a topic that I wasn't sure a lot of other people would think about but definitely one that I know someone else out there could relate to. For the audience of this I truly hope that it reaches others who may have needed to understand that others have this same academic struggle. 

Kathleen Rollings

Professor Nall

English Comp 2

9-18-2023

Setting Academic Boundaries

For me, wanting to excel at things I enjoy has always been a major goal. Academic and career success are a top priority for me it determines my future, but making sure others around me are happy and achieving their goals has always been something I felt was very important. When I was in high school, this never seemed to be much of a conflict. I did my work and teachers and people around me were happy. Then, I had a specifically set schedule; now that I am in college that schedule isn’t as concrete, and this is where the issue lies. How can I specifically set time aside for my academic success, while wanting to help others?

For most who have a people-pleasing issue, it goes down to the sense of wanting to be helpful. Many people who are like this get a sense of accomplishment or joy in helping others, but in the process of that, lose sight of themselves. This strain plays out in relationships, family dynamics, work life, and especially academics. People pleasing in academics play out multiple different ways, starting with your instructors. Wanting to make your instructors happy and have good grades can be a two-edged sword because while you excel, you’ll also get more of a workload because they feel they can rely on you (especially in lab-setting classes.) Saying no can often seem confrontational and disrespectful. How this comes into play with your peers, is in scheduling times to work on projects together, or tutoring them to a point as to where you can’t get your proper studying done. Because of these reasons, it makes for a stressful schedule and a very tight timeframe to study properly.

The first step is letting others know that sometimes you cannot be super-human. Instructors at your school are there for your success and although it is hard telling them where you do and don’t understand things making sure they know your capabilities will provide for a better learning experience for everyone. Likewise, with peers’ college isn’t you versus them, it’s everyone trying to reach a goal, but you cannot help others unless you help yourself first. So being firm in setting these boundaries, is a wonderful step in making sure you’re focused on your goals. The next way you can fix this is by understanding what you need to set time aside for, and your own goals. Utilizing tools to your advantage such as notes, reminders, and calendars can help. Setting specific times to read, study, or review coursework and making sure that you’re in an uninterrupted environment can be extremely helpful to your success. The last way I want to mention helping to stop people pleasing to better your academic success is also being the person who understands. What I mean by this is taking a moment to reflect on those around you as well. There are often others who are having this same issue and if you all just keep thinking you’re helping each other then really it does no one any benefit. So, in referring back to my first point of setting that boundary with others you must respect their boundaries as well and realize you can’t always help fix things for others.

Taking these steps for myself has been extremely hard, but I know that every time I do I’m able to help myself, and in turn help others it’s a huge relief and has made me more reliable for myself and others while achieving my goal!

Works Cited

 

Boyes, Alice. “Resisting the Pressure to Overwork.” Harvard Business Review, 26 May. 2022, https://hbr.org/2022/05/resisting-the-pressure-to-overwork. Accessed 18 September 2023

Graham, Robyn. “Is Being a People Pleaser Holding You Back from Success.” The Robyn Graham, 26 July. 2021, https://therobyngraham.com/beingapeoplepleaser/#:~:text=If%20you%20focus%20on%22pleasing%20others%20instead%20of,zone%20of%20genius%2C%20the%20more%20yyo%E2%80%99ll%20please%20yourself. Accessed 18 September 2023.

Humphrey, Hayden. “How People-Pleasing Is Affecting Your Career.” My Well Being, https://mywellbeing.com/workplace-wellbeing/people-pleasing-and-your-career. Accessed 18 September 2023.